encyclopedia of adoption

married birthparents

An estimated 6% or more of all infants placed for adoption were placed by their married parents, according to studies by the National Center for Health Statistics.

Married birthparents place their infants for adoption primarily because they do not believe in abortion but feel unwilling or unable to parent the child. Often they may have other children and suffer financial problems.

They may also be on the verge of a divorce or a separation and not want the child as a constant reminder of their former relationship together.

When married birthparents decide on adoption for their infants, they are often viewed with contempt and suspicion by the rest of society, who cannot understand how or why a married birthparent would do such a thing; ironically, it is perfectly understandable and acceptable to many that married people might choose to abort a fetus.

Sometimes the child who is placed for adoption is a toddler, and the reasons for placement are similar to the reasons for making an adoption decision for a newborn infant: financial problems, marital problems, child abuse or neglect or career goals that conflict with parenting a child.

The married birthparent might also face debilitating health or personal problems that his mate also finds difficult to cope with; as a result, both feel that having the child adopted by a loving couple is a viable solution.

For married birthparents, confidentiality and anonymity may be particularly important, given the lack of understanding society often has for their dilemma.

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